Life is suffering, you cannot have the good without the bad and what hurts you most is the thing that is most important to you. No matter how bad things sometimes appear to be, there will be a gift, a time for growth where you have an opportunity to build courage and character for when you most need it.
There is a gift in everything, you just need to find it.
I live, breath, think and reflect in sunny Cornwall, UK. I have just turned 47 (I think) and started an incredible journey that should have been started many times before. I am currently writing my second book ‘The Gift of No Choice‘.
I like making a difference to other people’s lives, and whether it’s through my teaching of meditation and mindfulness, or politics on the city council it is important to me to bring positive open hearted change.
My book ‘How to Find Your Inner Peace: 5 SIMPLE PRACTICES to enjoy more sleep, stillness, happiness and freedom.’ Is available to download for free and has been updated for 2020. CLICK HERE
I believe in the present only. Most people are either living in the past or the future. I try not to resent or feel guilty about anything in the past or worry about events in the future. Letting the past live in your mind robs you of life. In the same way, so does worrying about future; most things we worry about never happen, or our worry, like fear, stops us from living. Either way, the present is a gift: ENJOY it and USE it. If you KNOW something is going to happen, you have the gift of time to prepare.
With that said, it is important to share a little about my background. After a diving accident in 1991 and following a year long hospital stay, I was left severely paralysed from the chest down with limited arm movement and no hand function. As my spinal cord was completely severed it wasn’t something I could ever walk away from. I have seen spinal cord injured people walk away; some people put it down to willpower, others to some religious belief. They have my complete respect but they are the lucky ones that never completely severed their spinal cord, the body CANNOT repair a severed spinal cord. For the record I’m a complete C5 quadriplegic (called tetraplegic in the UK); this means all four limbs are affected. After many close calls in the hospital, I returned home a year later. Read My life as a C5 Quadriplegic / Tetraplegic.
My childhood consisted of my parents going through a divorce, us being homeless and having to live in a caravan temporally, a family suicide, in my teens I attempted suicide myself. It wasn’t all bad far from it, but these are moments that have effect. All this before I then broke my neck a few months later. Since then, my life’s been pretty good, with few loved-and-lost stories. In 1997 I opened a computer shop; after many ups and downs we closed doors in 2000, and I filed for bankruptcy.
It was during that time I met Emma, the mother of my stepdaughter Kember. While with Emma I did several challenges for charity (including a 900 mile trip in my wheelchair!) and also organised a few music festivals. We separated after almost 12 years. In July 2012 I fell deeply, but split up after almost 8 months, this was ‘my rock bottom’, it was what I needed to turn my life around. It was my gift!
But back to my favourite time: THE PRESENT. I’ve lost weight, eating healthy and exercising daily to build up my muscles for any challenge. I am very busy having gone back to public speaking and writing for the first time, my second book is coming along nicely; as for the other plans, all I can say is they are awesome.