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How to deal with loud and aggressive people

We have all been at the mercy of someones anger and it is not nice, in fact it feels horrible. Even worse when there is no justification for them to aim their anger towards us. On the flip side whether we want to admit it or not we too have found ourselves frustrated and taken our anger out on somebody that did not deserve it.

It is handy to bear in mind that we can all be loud and aggressive when we care passionately about something. Like when a driver cuts in front of us on the road and we feel threatened or in danger in some way. It is normal conditioned human behavior to react for protection reasons.

Read more for the solution.

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3 Reasons Why You Will Not Meditate

May 2014, I believed the only way I could escape my thoughts and painful feelings would be to completely shutdown and block all my feelings. A breakdown was on the cards and I believed I deserved it. After all, other people have breakdowns for a lot less than what I’m coping with. Why not me? I wanted a break. But I kept going. (I had recently become single which I wrote about in this blog, How I Learned to Forgive.)

It was a tough time. Very painful, possibly the hardest time of my life. It does show how much emotional pain hurts when even breaking my neck doesn’t compare.

At some point during that month I made a conscious decision to change. I was no longer going to be controlled by a constant stream of damaging and random thoughts running through my head. I couldn’t think straight let alone have the ability to accomplish anything beyond the normal daily chores.

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Do you feel like you are always suffering? Ask yourself this question.

Anybody can be happy when things are going smoothly, you can pay your bills, in a secure relationship and your career is comfortable. It isn’t until something really sideswipes us to such an amount that we have no choice but to deal with it. Something that causes us a lot of pain and upset. Something that knocks us on our butt to such a degree that we see no way out. We feel like giving up and just allowing the world to continue hitting us because nothing else matters any more. In the summer of 91 I remember sitting on the steps of Truro Cathedral crying my […]

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What advice would I give my younger self based on what I know today?

During a recent interview I was asked what advice I would give to my younger self based on what I know today? That was easy. I never even had to think about it. “Read more books, watch less TV and appreciate time more than money.” It came out like a pre-defined script. But, I’ve been thinking about the question ever since and with a little time and reflection I would like to change my advice. Watching less TV could lead to any number of other time-killing activities and reading books could lead me down into any type of direction, and I like who I have […]

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Valuing your time more than money is linked to happiness

I think we are all guilty of thinking more money would lead to more #happiness at one time or another. We’ve all heard the phrase “money does not buy you happiness” and on a deeper level we know this is true. If you do not have enough money to pay your bills, eat relatively well and have a small luxury like eating out occasionally then yes of course you would be forgiven for thinking money is more important than time. In six studies in which nearly 5,000 participants were asked questions to see what they valued more, time or money, it was an almost evenly split whether they had money […]

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Overcoming the Fear of Failure

While attending secondary school, I used to run cross-country and was moderately good; good enough to run for the school and my county on a couple of occasions. Prior to becoming paralysed in 1991, I wanted to run the London Marathon. You know, one of those things I was ‘going to do’. I saw it as an egoic challenge and something that would make me feel good if I was to complete it. Although the accident that followed left me unable to feel or move any of my body below my chest, let alone run any kind of marathon, the desire for a challenge never […]

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Why I’m giving up on my search for happiness.

I’m serious, after many years of my constant search for #happiness I decided to give up. Let me explain why. While walking home just after dark, a women sees a man searching for something at the base of a streetlight. As she approaches him, she asks… “What are you looking for?” “My keys.” Replies the man as he continues to search. After a short while of searching she asks “where did you lose them?” “In my house.” “Then why are you searching for them here?” “Because it is dark in my house.” Although this tale seems ridiculous, it makes a very good point of the […]

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How to move on when you don't want to

How to move on when you don’t want too.

When Hernan Cortes, A Spanish Conquistador landed along with 600 soldiers in 11 ships on the Mexican shores 500 years ago, they were given no options but to either return as heroes or die in battle. Cortes gave the unthinkable order to ‘burn the ships’. His soldiers were outnumbered and under ‘normal circumstances’ (if there is such a thing in war) they wouldn’t have stood a chance in winning. However, they DID win. Okay, ending a relationship whether it’s with a romantic partner, a work colleague or a friend, is not the same as conquering a country but the same principles apply. If you give […]

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